As a career coach, my teammates and I can’t help but notice certain patterns. Right now, employee frustration is at an all-time high. Workers are feeling fed up with their employers and wondering if the grass could be greener elsewhere.
While pay and opportunity for growth are the top two reasons people claim they want to find a new job, latest research shows that what ultimately pushes a person to seek a new job is feeling disrespected by their boss. Think of it this way: most professionals enjoy a job search about as much as they enjoy having a tooth pulled. In order to put in the extra time and energy to switch jobs, the pain has to be really bad.
“You teach people how to treat you.” — Oprah Winfrey
When job seekers vent about their manager’s lack of respect, the first thing we discuss is Oprah’s famous quote. Like it or not, it’s true. If you don’t have the respect you want, it’s because you allowed your boss to treat you a certain way. From your first interaction with your boss until now, you have set the tone for how you’re perceived in the role. The good news is, you can change this. But to do so, you have to recognize the signs that your manager doesn’t respect you.
Here are seven to consider:
- They call you in a panic about an ASAP task — only to go silent on you.
- They change their mind daily about what they want you to work on.
- They ask to review every task you complete.
- They tell you to do unnecessary, tedious work.
- They constantly cancel and reschedule meetings with you.
- You have to chase them down for answers and approval.
- They dismiss your questions and concerns.
If you can say “yes” to more than two of the above, it’s safe to say your boss has concluded that you aren’t a trusted resource. Which means, it’s time to work on a communication strategy to turn things around.
What to do? Talk their language.
The best way to increase the respect you get from your boss is to understand what your manager values most in a working relationship. To put it simply, people trust those they feel they can effectively communicate with. Lack of respect is a sign that somewhere along the way, your approach to communicating with your boss failed. In every case I’ve seen where an employee feels disrespected by a manager, it comes down to a disconnect in their opposing communication style. If you don’t know how to interact with your boss in a way he prefers, you won’t earn the respect you need to succeed.
NOTE: I’m not suggesting you change who you are. All I’m saying is that to get what you want, you need to speak the language of your manager.
Don’t let a lack of respect from your boss hold you back from achieving your goals. Learn how to interact better so you can get what you need to succeed!